Just flat iron your hair and start enjoying your life

I can't tell you how many messages I get with people venting their frustrations with their curly hair.

They are desperate to get it right, and they buy all the courses and use all the products. 

"What am I doing wrong?" they ask.

Sometimes I can suggest a simple tweak to help, but a lot of the time, it's an acceptance thing that goes much deeper than wanting to eliminate frizz.

Here is my most heartfelt recommendation... get out the flat iron and start enjoying your life again.

Your hair shouldn't be robbing you of joy. 

Why would a curl specialist say this? How come I don't just put on my cheerleading uniform (I have some...they wouldn't fit anymore...lol) and encourage you not to give up?

I didn't go into this career path to convince you to stick with something that makes you feel miserable.  I always wanted to be in the beauty industry to make you feel pretty.

It's that simple.

Embracing your curly/wavy hair is all about liberation and freedom. It's meant to take you out of a box, not put you in one.

I've also never been in the club that says you can't wear your hair in many different styles.

I'm here to show you how to wear it in its natural state, using your own movement and bend.

What about the health of my hair? If I put heat on it, won't I be damaging my curl pattern?

If you want the healthiest hair, stay away from heat. Also, don't color your hair. Wash more frequently..because your hair is as healthy as your scalp, and scalp needs frequent exfoliation. Use products without harmful ingredients. 

If health is your why...then work on acceptance of your own pattern and texture...frizz and all.

But if easy is your why and you are finding that it's much harder than your old flat ironing ways, then pull it back out.

Recently Aleesha (my stepdaughter with the big beautiful bounty of hair) had her hair flat ironed. She told me that it's easier to flat iron with her current work schedule and a very active 3-year-old. Her hair lasts for almost 3 weeks like this. 

She has to wet it every day with some conditioner not to dread up in its curly state. (She literally has some of the densest hair I've ever worked with)

So easy is her why and what is working right now for her lifestyle and current stage of life.

Yet, she has also expressed how she feels more connected with herself and her Black heritage when she wears it curly. A few weeks later, she had it curly again.

Does it ruin her curls?

When she was flat ironing all the time, during her high school years, yes, we had to cut off all the ends that would never curl again. There was damage beyond repair. 

Now that she does it every once in a while...no. 

 Everyone's hair responds differently to heat. I have clients who have tighter textured coils and, after flat ironing for a special event... it felt like their curls did not go back to their original state. Those clients have committed to using no heat at all.

For myself ( I'm a wavy), I can flat iron, blow out, hot roller, etc., and it has no lasting effect on wearing it wavy the next day. 

I don't. Because my why is I'm a little lazy. Lol.

I love just washing my hair, scrunching in some gel, and rollin' out the door. 

My hair has thinned out so much as I've aged...thank you, perimenopause...that it feels fuller when I wear it wavy.

As I'm writing this, I have 4 days of no washing itchy scalp, and it makes my lifestyle easier to think...ok...I will wash and gel and roll...then if I thought...omg...I have to wash, dry, blow straight, get out the big curling iron, make new curls, etc...

Then my second thought is...I'm going to have to wash tomorrow because I'm filming a video, and I don't want to do 2 hair days in a row, so maybe I should take just a ponytail and itchy the rest of today. Lol.

I want to hear from you...

Has going curly made you feel like it's consuming your life?